74: The law of attraction and manifestation is about more than just believing with Heather Rosewood

[00:00:00] Rosie: G'day and welcome to the Pursuit of Freedom podcast. I'm your host, Rosie Burrows, and I'm on a journey to find my freedom so that I can help you do exactly the same. Join me each week as I share the stories of everyday people who found their own path to freedom. I'm not going to focus on job titles and accolades because I don't care about that stuff, and neither should you.

[00:00:24] I want to uncover what truly makes you tick. Who are you when you step away from society's expectations and follow your heart? I still haven't figured it out yet. Have you? Either way, buckle up, because it's going to be one hell of a ride.

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[00:00:44] Rosie: Welcome back to the Pursuit of Freedom podcast. Joining us today is the wonderful Heather Rosewood. She is a manifestation and success strategist. She is also a USA Today bestselling author, and she has spent the last 12 years exploring what it takes to turn dreams into reality.

[00:01:04] Embracing the law of attraction, Heather, you went from living in survival mode to today, driving around in a Range Rover, traveling the world and essentially doing What you want, which is, that just sounds amazing to me. And these days you support people like me, like our listeners who are ready to break free from society's limitations to pursue success on their terms and manifest big goals in all areas of life and business.

[00:01:31] So guys buckle up. If this sounds of interest, I'm really excited to dive into it. And Heather, thank you so much for joining us.

[00:01:40] Heather: Thank you for having me. Super

[00:01:42] Rosie: excited. Yeah, me too. I just kind of want to dive into the nuts and bolts of this because the law of attraction is something that seems to be gaining more and more popularity.

[00:01:53] Or at least more and more people talking about it. And if I'm being honest, I don't think I fully understand what it is. So could you break down for us, what is the law of attraction? Yeah. So

[00:02:09] Heather: in a, in a nutshell, basically. What you believe in your perception of life is what your life is going to be. So, for the simplest term, if you believe that you're only capable of making 30 an hour, and that's the absolute max you're going to make, and you believe that you're not qualified to go to college or anything else, then that's going to be your life.

[00:02:31] You're not going to go to college if you don't. Think that you're qualified to go to college, right? So what you believe you can attract into your life. So we had like, for my car, we'll be like super specific, right?

[00:02:47] I wanted this car.

[00:02:49] I wanted this car for a long time. And so in order to get this car, I was like, okay.

[00:02:56] I don't know how to feel what it feels like to have this car. I've never been in one. So I rented one and drove it around for the weekend. So now I know what it drives like, what it smells like, what it's like to put the blinker on. So every time I get in my Jeep, I'm like, I'm driving a Range Rover. Right.

[00:03:15] So you just embody that feeling and you attract it to you. Does that make sense for you?

[00:03:21] Rosie: Yeah. So it's, it very much sounds linked to your mindset, right? Everything is linked to your mind. Yeah. And another term I hear is manifestation. Is that similar to the law of attraction? Is it the same? There, so,

[00:03:38] Heather: so manifestation is kind of the blanket term of everything.

[00:03:41] And the law of attraction is actually a sub law from the law of vibration. So the law it's. There's 12 universal laws that I follow and law of vibration is one of them. And the law of attraction is actually kind of a sub law of that. So like, um, everything in our planet is actually vibrating, like we're vibrating beings, plants vibrate, the table vibrates, everything vibrates.

[00:04:09] plants and things are kind of lower than humans and humans vibrate and love and our emotions make it so that if you're feeling a really low vibrational thing, like fear, lack, that kind of stuff, so you're vibrating lower. You're, you want to vibrate higher. So all of our heart and mind kind of goes together in this.

[00:04:34] Yeah. Because our heart and our mind are attached, because everything we do, we do with emotion. Every decision we make, everything is done with emotion. So where's your emotion? It's in your subconscious. Right. So it's all linked into your mind.

[00:04:52] Rosie: Yeah. Okay. Okay. This is helping me put it all into place now because I've never actually had anyone break it down for me and I'm like, well, I kind of get what it is.

[00:05:01] Yeah.

[00:05:02] Heather: And a lot of people, they really, they'll kind of walk around and they're like, Oh, I'm doing my affirmations and I'm, I am wealthy. I am wealthy. I am confident. And I'm just like, well, if you don't actually believe that you're wealthy or confident, you're really, Just telling the universe that you're not confident because you can't lie to the universe.

[00:05:22] It knows, what you feel because it's all feeling and emotion.

[00:05:26] Rosie: So how do we? believe these affirmations we tell ourselves or the things we put out into the world? Because I think a lot of us would like a better life and a more aligned life and whatever else we want as part of that. But sometimes we lack the confidence or we question whether it's really possible.

[00:05:47] So how do we get to a place where we believe it is possible? Yeah. So

[00:05:54] Heather: it takes a bit of mindset work, obviously. So I always start with awareness. Right? Because if you're not aware of what your beliefs are, how do what you're blocking or limiting from yourself or what you're calling in? Right? So if you believe that everybody needs to grow up, go to college, get married, have a picket fence and a couple of kids, and that's a corporate job.

[00:06:24] If that's your belief. Is that your belief or is that someone else's beliefs that they gave to you? Because we are, we come kind of pre programmed almost with our family's beliefs because we learn them as. We're children, right? Then you're gonna get all of society's beliefs and what everybody else thinks you should do.

[00:06:42] So, so many people walk around doing everything that everyone else thinks they should do. And then they get so scared. Oh, well, what will Tom, Dick, and Harry think if I put myself out on a live on Facebook? And it's like, who cares? Who cares what they think? Are they going to go, they're going to say something anyway, no matter what you do.

[00:07:04] Oh, you didn't do it. You're chicken. Oh, you did it. Look at you. Like it doesn't matter.

[00:07:08] Rosie: It's not about them.

[00:07:10] Heather: Yeah. But so many people get stuck in that. They get stuck in that fear of not knowing how to move forward. So once you get where you're actually. Where you are, right? And then you're going to do some identity work and like, who do you want to be?

[00:07:28] Because you get to choose, you don't have like, there's no rules. There's no limits, like if you want to be a neuroscience, like, I mean, obviously you would have to go to school for that because doctors and laws and stuff, but you can do it, right? There's no limit at all. I'll tell you when I said I was doing stuff, people literally laughed at me.

[00:07:53] They're like, there's no way you're doing that. And I was like, yes, I am.

[00:07:58] And I travel wherever I want to go, I fly first class, I do whatever I want to do.

[00:08:04] Rosie: So how did she? We've come across the law of attraction. Is this just something you've always known about or did someone introduce you to it?

[00:08:14] Heather: I was, it was 2008 ish. I was getting divorced and it was just an awful time and I needed something to cling to. Right. I had been in survival mode for like five years at this point. I'm a single mom and, I barely know how I'm buying groceries. Right. And I'm just like, something's got to give. And I saw the movie, the secret.

[00:08:42] And I was like, well, that was kind of cheesy, but what if, and so I started kind of looking at more stuff and I'm on YouTube and I find Louise Hay and. Uh, Wayne Dyer, and I'm just like, huh, and then I see Abraham Hicks, and I'm like, okay, well, let me buy a book. So then I got a book, and now I'm reading the book, and I'm like, okay, well, I'll buy another book, and it just kind of spirals, and I'm just like, okay, well, I actually kind of feel better.

[00:09:10] Another book, right? So it just kind of keeps going and going and I'm like absorbing everything I can get for pretty much no money because I didn't have it, yeah. So I just was like, okay. And I'm, I haven't actually told anybody this. I'm scrolling Etsy and I see a necklace that I wanted to get my mom for Mother's Day and it was like 40.

[00:09:34] Right. And I'm like, she made how many of those? And sold them on Etsy for four, 40 bucks was like, okay, so 900 later, I have all the supplies to make this necklace and I'm like, I'm doing it. So I'm making necklaces on my kitchen table. And uh, I made millions off that business. I ended up getting a laser engraver and I had staff and we made custom engraved jewelry For like seven years and finally I was like, I'm gonna go travel so I stopped doing that and here we are

[00:10:13] Rosie: so Something I hear And I have to admit, this is a thought that has crossed my mind before, if I'm keeping it real. Sometimes I hear people talk about the law of attraction. And I think, so are you saying, if I just think positive and put out into the world, this is what I want, that it's just going to land in my lap?

[00:10:34] People like to think

[00:10:35] Heather: that. That's not exactly how that works out though. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, you can. No, we wouldn't say you can't, right? Right, right. I mean, you sit there trying to manifest 20 grand and it lands in the mailbox, it could happen. Yeah. It's really unlikely, right? So, it's more that you decide, like, say that, like right now, I really want to go to the Christmas markets.

[00:11:03] I can't go this year because it's way too late. Right. But so I've decided next year I'm going. Right? So, I'm going to hold the view that I'm going, and next year, I will be there. So, I'm going to take the steps I need to take to make sure I can be there. Right? And, I believe I can be there. So, I mean, we could use a little bit, uh, different example that might be more relatable to people if you'd like, but it's, um, like my house, right?

[00:11:36] I wanted a house built before 1900 that had already had all of the major renovations done, and it had to have two acres because, um, as we talked before, uh, I have dogs. And I had all these requirements, right? And on my vision board, I had a colonial looking house, green kitchen cabinets, like sage green kitchen cabinets, and all redone.

[00:12:03] That's what this house has. It has all of it. It has every single thing that was on my vision board. And I randomly found this house on the internet. Like I just held the vision that that's the house I want. And, you just, you don't, it's not going to land in your lap. You have to actually work for it.

[00:12:21] Right. You have to know, like, you're not going to be like, Oh, I want that house and it's going to be free. Right. You have to still buy the house.

[00:12:28] Rosie: Right. But it's there. Yeah. So it very much sounds like you set the intention. And then it's not kicking back and going, yep, the universe will deliver this maybe on the off chance, maybe, but really you need to take the steps and be very intentional to, to make happen.

[00:12:52] Heather: And you have to create the identity that can do that. Like, uh, last year I decided that I wanted to be a public speaker. So I've never been on stage or done anything at that point. I was like, speaking in front of a giant crowd of people seemed a little intimidating. And I was like, well, I really want to do this.

[00:13:12] So I decided that's what I was going to do. And I set the intention that I was going to do it. And I got invited to go to a small stage. There was like 10 people. And I was like, okay, well, let's, base camp, right? So I went and did that and it just, it keeps going. But as soon as you decide that you have, you're the person that can do that.

[00:13:36] Cause if you decide that you want to be. I'm going to be a public speaker, but you haven't made any steps to prepare yourself to actually go on stage. Like what if somebody called you and said, Hey, you want to come on stage next week? You're not prepared. You don't have a speech. You don't have any of this done, right?

[00:13:53] You're not preparing yourself and becoming the person Who can do that? So that is really important is you have to embody the person that actually can do it. Yeah. So if you want to be a race car driver, you're not going to just go buy a race car and get on the track. You have to train and learn to be a race car driver and you have to take on the

[00:14:17] Rosie: identity.

[00:14:18] I'm a race car driver,

[00:14:19] Heather: right?

[00:14:20] Rosie: Yeah. I mean, that makes a lot of sense. And it sounds logical because I think sometimes. It's the way some people talk about the law of attraction. It just sounds like this magical thing that's from a, a fantasy novel. And I think that, there probably is an element of magic, right?

[00:14:37] It's really cool. But also you set the intention, you do the work, you're embodying the kind of person you want to be. Right.

[00:14:45] Heather: And you're, There is some magic feeling to it, honestly. I mean, find what you want or what it just, it really does just show up, like you're sitting there and you're like, Oh, I've decided I want to do this and like, literally you'll get an email or an invite or from a totally random place or something you haven't.

[00:15:09] Even talk to these, I haven't talked to this person in 10 years and they just randomly text me, right? It's like, wow. Okay. Yeah. Cause I put it out in the universe. I want to do that. Isn't it interesting. Yeah. The whole universe is aligned. Like it's kind of, when you're sitting there and you're kind of minding your own business and somebody crosses your mind and you're like, I need to call them and they're like, I was just thinking about you cause you guys are, whether you realize it or not, you're actually communicating.

[00:15:38] Rosie: Hmm. Yeah. You're in alignment there. Yeah. And no matter people's beliefs, I think everybody can relate to what you're, you're saying there. And I know for me, when I open my mind to opportunities and doing things in a different way, it is fascinating. The things that come my way, it's like, it just like, it's like, huh?

[00:16:00] So as soon as I stopped being closed off going, that's not possible, that's not the way life works. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:16:06] Heather: Yeah, like if you have it set like, Oh, the only place I can get clients is Instagram and it has to come from Instagram. Well, good luck, right here. Like that's going to be a hard road, right?

[00:16:19] But if your clients come from anywhere, they can knock on the door. They could, you could be in line at the drugstore and be talking to somebody ask what you do. And then next thing their neighbors knocking on your door, you never know where people

[00:16:33] Rosie: are coming from. It's very true.

[00:16:35] And, and we, I think we can limit ourselves and hold ourselves back if we believe it's a certain way. Then. We're kind of just going to make it happen and prove out to ourselves, well, it is that way.

[00:16:48] Heather: Yeah. And a lot of people get really, uh, kind of weird about manifestation and law of attraction and the whole woo woo, and they're like, Oh, that's crazy.

[00:16:58] People don't do that. And I mean, my 75 year old mom, now I say something and she goes, I'm manifesting that. And I'm just like, Oh my goodness. Created a monster. Yeah. Everything out of you. Right? So she knows, like, I mean, I, one of my dogs just walked up here. I decided I wanted to show dogs and last year I, this dog was the number eight owner handled Australian Shepherd in the country.

[00:17:24] Wow.

[00:17:25] Rosie: Yeah. Wow. So let's, let's dive in a bit more. Yes. We've, we've spoken about all the positives, but I'm guessing it can still be really difficult. So have you ever had moments? Where you question what you're doing like, oh, yeah, I don't know Maybe you've had a rough day or a couple of things have happened and you just gone.

[00:17:47] Oh, can I actually do this? Do you ever have those moments? Oh,

[00:17:51] Heather: oh, it's just human. You just don't unpack and live there, right? I mean, it's okay to get upset and to have emotions and be mad or what, life happens, right? But if you don't unpack and live there then You just kind of recover. Like once you are in a spot where like, these things aren't going to bother you as much.

[00:18:11] And like if somebody was talking about you say, and like now that would like, I'm like, okay, whatever, that's their problem. Like they can think whatever they want, but 10 years ago, that would really hurt my feelings. I'd have got all, I'd have been really hurt. So you heal and you kind of move forward and, You don't get as hurt by a lot of things, but there are things, manifestation laws, all this stuff, they don't work on time.

[00:18:41] Right. So it, that is frustrating for a lot of people because they're like, Oh, I've been saying affirmations for four days and this hasn't shown up. It's like, well, I might show up for four months, like, you don't know. It doesn't happen that way, you just have to hold the intention that that's what you want and believe it's going to happen, right?

[00:19:03] But when you start putting timeframes on things and start pushing things and then you don't see them showing up, and that's when you start actually not be like, your subconscious isn't actually going to believe that's going to show up if you're sitting there thinking it's not going to show up.

[00:19:16] Rosie: Right?

[00:19:16] Right.

[00:19:17] Heather: Okay. And I like to look for things, I call them signs of land, right? So like, if I'm, in a boat and I take off and I'm in the middle of the ocean, I know I'm going to hit land eventually, right? I don't know when, I'm in a boat,

[00:19:34] Rosie: right?

[00:19:34] Heather: I'm rowing and what I want is land. Am I, how do I know when I'm going to get there?

[00:19:40] I don't, but you'll see a sign of land out there. Like, uh, I decided I was going to sell my house. And I haven't even put it on the market and I randomly got a text from somebody yesterday and they said, Hey, any chance you want to sell that house? I was like, I've been saying, I've been thinking about doing this for about six months since June and I haven't actually done anything about it.

[00:20:06] I haven't said anything to anyone. I told my mom. That's it. Yeah. That I was going to sell the house after the first of the year. And somebody texted me just yesterday, it says, you want to sell your house? Like there's a sign of land. Will I sell it to them? Probably not. Cause they probably want it at a discount and flip it, but it's a sign of land.

[00:20:24] Some like the universe heard me say, I'm going to sell this

[00:20:28] Rosie: house. Right. So, yeah. And you don't know exactly how it's going to happen. It's almost like you're saying a direction and

[00:20:35] Heather: then. And that does get really hard because the banks do have a timeline, right? So if you're like, Oh, I need to manifest 3, 000 to pay my bills this month and you'd like, that's, that's probably not the smartest manifestation tool.

[00:20:54] Because banks do have a timeline, whether we do or not, right? So, you don't want to, bet the farm on it, so to speak, because. It, I 100 percent believe if I want it and I set the intention for it, and I believe in my subconscious and reprogramming your subconscious is actually not always as easy as you think, because you might think you're like, Oh, I'm good there.

[00:21:26] But you're not. And so that's where we dive really deep into things like EFT tapping, uh, visualizations, a lot of journaling, journaling is one of my absolute favorite go tos.

[00:21:41] Rosie: I'm just absorbing all of this because it's a learning journey for me. And I'm so grateful you're sharing this because I think some people might not be comfortable answering these questions. I'm coming from a place of curiosity, but I know sometimes when I meet people and I start asking questions, they get defensive.

[00:22:01] Heather: Yeah. Well, and there's a lot of people who, um, because it's kind of a newer. thing that people are kind of opening up to, but they don't realize how much science is actually behind it. That can back it back up a lot of this stuff, like, our neural pathways, if you are thinking negative things all the time, you're absorbing that energy and you're automatic, like who you're around, you're automatically going to kind of start mirroring how they are, right.

[00:22:32] But if you're always around positive people and people who are bettering themselves. You're going to be doing that, right? So it, it makes a huge difference and people don't realize how much science is behind it that, and I, I post a lot of it on social media. Like I'll, I'll reference, uh, different science things more on Tik TOK than I do anywhere else.

[00:22:56] Cause that's kind of my fun platform. But, uh, There's just, it's fascinating to me and I always look for the science because, I, the brain in itself, just, it is so powerful and we don't even use a minute of it.

[00:23:17] Rosie: And I think the fact neuroscience can support a lot of this will, would, will help, uh, more people embrace the law of attraction and manifestation, or I feel like other ways Words are used for similar things, right? Yeah. Because some people are very logical and they need to see the science behind it. And part of me is like that too.

[00:23:43] And the more I learn about it, I'm like, this is fascinating because there is a spiritual side to it, but also then the more tangible science side. There is. And

[00:23:54] Heather: I really like to, um, a lot of people, go back to that phrase, mind, body, spirit. But for me, it is actually more. Spirit mind body, right?

[00:24:04] Because we all need. Some kind of, I, you call it universe, spirit, God, whatever you would like your source to be, but everybody needs a source of spirituality, right? And once you're, you have that, and then you started doing that identity and figuring out who you are because your beliefs form your identity and who you are, and then you can really start embodying that and being that person.

[00:24:34] And it's not really like. Fake it until you make it. But if I'm going to show up every time I go and shop or whatever, like how you present yourself is how people are going to perceive you. So, I personally wear a lot of like t shirts, shorts, and so I'm always working out in the yard doing things, but.

[00:24:57] If I'm going to go to a dinner, um, that's nicer, you're going to show up looking the part, right? So people will automatically believe that you are that already because you showed up as that person. So in that collective, right?

[00:25:17] Rosie: That's powerful.

[00:25:19] I'm going to ask a question. It's a little bit. controversial. So I really want to hear your, I don't know if controversial is the word, but I guess maybe a little bit confronting. Something that comes up for me sometimes, depending on how people are talking about the law of attraction. Actually, I'll give you an example.

[00:25:39] I have a friend, love her dearly. And she talks about how the universe will always provide. And we will always, it will always provide money to us if we just trust that. And I want to believe that so badly. I don't think I'm quite convinced yet, but I want to embrace it so fully. And every now and then, a thought crossed my mind.

[00:26:01] We have people who are homeless, people who are in poverty, and it's like, are we victim blaming these people? So what are your thoughts around that?

[00:26:12] Heather: I don't know that it's necessarily victim blaming as much as there's, I mean, there's so many different ways to put it. Because the people like in Haiti are going to be different than the people in Los Angeles.

[00:26:26] Right. Like, it's just going to be different levels of that. And so you, the universe will provide you everything you need. Will it provide it for you in the timeline that you specify that you need it by? Maybe. Right.

[00:26:42] Rosie: Right.

[00:26:42] Heather: Maybe not. Right. And so when it doesn't give it to you by that timeline, that's where you start to doubt.

[00:26:48] And that's where your subconscious comes in because if you're not believing it, your subconscious is not going to happen ever, no matter what. Right. So when you get people who are. Raised in a environment where they don't have anything. And, when you're raised in an environment where you don't have anything and you're always told you don't have anything, like I didn't go to college.

[00:27:12] I was raised in a household where college was not even on the table. We can't afford that period. That was like, not even like, don't ever bring it up because it's not going to happen. And, , there was a lot of things we didn't do because we didn't have the money. Right. And, I remember I was seven years old and I said, one of my aunts or somebody sitting around and they said, what do y'all want to be when you grow up?

[00:27:34] And I said, I wanted to be an author. I'm going to be a famous author. And then she laughed in my face, literally laughed in my face. And that put that belief that I wasn't able to be an author in my subconscious for years. I published my first book when I was 50. Wow. So, it, your beliefs all stem from how you grew up.

[00:27:59] So if you're raised in a house that only believes like this is we're poor and we can't be anything but poor, and then their children are poor and don't believe they can be anything but poor and it just keeps going. It's a cycle. So. Until somebody breaks out of that, they can't. And there's some people that just aren't going to have the resources to break out of it.

[00:28:23] Like, like Haiti, for example, is where I was going with that. It's like, they just don't have the ability to get out of it because of where they are in the world. I mean, I don't know a lot about Haiti, but I'm from what I've seen on the news. I don't think that they, Have, uh, the resources that we have in more developed countries.

[00:28:46] So it's hard to say that they, I mean, I don't think they're victims of not believing or being shamed or anything. They're just not in a place that has the resources to get. The things in, maybe they could at some, I don't know what kind of help they have, but I think circumstance in that would make a difference

[00:29:12] Rosie: generally,

[00:29:13] Heather: generally kind of say, don't live by circumstance.

[00:29:15] But if that's the circumstance you were handed in life and your clothing is a wrap, then you're just given a different, environment.

[00:29:29] Rosie: Yeah, that really speaks to me because it acknowledges that we all are starting from a different place and some of us are afforded more privilege and others we've got a lot of disadvantage.

[00:29:42] So I appreciate you talking about it in that way because it acknowledges, yeah, some of us start in a much shittier situation and it's not to say you can't get out of it, but it acknowledges the reality that, hey, the resources you have. And the mindset and the beliefs, that's a big part too.

[00:30:02] Heather: Yeah. It's life.

[00:30:04] It's makes it a lot more difficult for you, and you see a lot of, uh, a lot of like the manifestation coach, I hate the whole social media manifestation coach because these people are walking around and they're like, Oh, look at my Prada bag. Look at this. Look at that. And I'm just like. Yeah. Well, I have on my Disney t shirt and I just bought 400 books for this school thing down the road.

[00:30:27] So, it's, you just do what you feel called to do with what you can. And if flaunting that and making that makes is what's making you feel good, then, good for

[00:30:42] Rosie: you.

[00:30:43] Heather: Yeah. Good

[00:30:44] Rosie: for you. Right. Exactly. Not my cup of tea, but if it's yours, that's cool. Exactly. Exactly. So let's talk about some of these limiting beliefs, because this is something I'm pretty passionate about.

[00:30:56] We all have many limiting beliefs, or we have these beliefs we think are our own, but we've never kind of stopped to question them and go, Oh, hang on. So how do we overcome or begin to unpick these limiting beliefs?

[00:31:13] Heather: It's, it's all starts with that awareness work, because if you don't even know you have that belief, you can't know that you want to change it.

[00:31:24] Right. So like, uh, we'll use my mom for an example because she was absolutely not a believer in any of this in the beginning. Yeah. And, uh, So, she believes you grow up, you get married, you have kids, you get your house and you have, God knows how much money and savings before you can actually go do anything else because what if you run out of money, and so now we're hoarding money because we might run out sometime if, we get a flat tire, like, why are we inventing things to happen so that we can hoard money so that we can.

[00:32:05] Maybe have some tragedy happen, like what, right? Why are you inventing things that could go wrong? Like, we just think everything's going to go right. What if it went right? Why does it have to go wrong? Right. Uh, now when, we had a little argument about my nails, is this one of my, my, uh, things, right?

[00:32:31] Because I like the way my hands look with nails. I always digging in dirt and doing stuff, they're ugly, right? When I got, so we were doing some, and it was before I actually started making a lot of money. And she's like, well, you went and spent all that money on those nails. And I was like, it was 20 and it makes me feel good.

[00:32:49] How much money do I need to have in savings before I can spend 20 to make myself feel good, mom? And that's when she kind of backed up and she was like, well, I never really thought about it like that. And I'm like, if it makes me feel good and it is who I am, then what dollar amount are we putting on it that makes it not okay?

[00:33:11] Um, so that was a limiting belief that she had that I shouldn't spend a single dollar on myself until I had a, some figure in the bank. And we don't even know what that figure is, right? So I'm like, that's your limiting belief that I'm going to believe that I need to feel good. I want to look good. I want to feel good.

[00:33:37] 36 years old, like I want to live mom.

[00:33:42] Rosie: Yeah.

[00:33:43] Heather: Now she's like, gosh, your nails are getting long. You should get them done. I'll get a pedicure. I was like, okay. So, but she didn't realize she had that belief. She didn't realize that she was raised. But, my grandfather was a farmer, so she was raised that you put everything away because we could have a bad winter.

[00:34:08] Right.

[00:34:09] Rosie: Yeah.

[00:34:10] Heather: And I'm like, this, that's not how life works anymore. We're not farmers. I can go to the grocery store. So it, all of your beliefs, I kind of got a little bit off track, but your beliefs are going to matter with that. Like, if you believe that you're not a farmer. a good enough swimmer to be in a swim competition, then you're never going to be in that swim competition.

[00:34:38] So you have to believe that you're good enough to do it. And worthiness is a worthiness imposter syndrome. These are things that come up that people don't even realize they have. And, um, like podcasting, how many people would be like, Oh my gosh, you do a podcast and you're going on that.

[00:34:55] You're going to talk live on the internet. I'm like, Yeah. Yeah. With someone in Australia. Yeah. Like, it's like, it's just normal to me now, but for someone who's never done it, they're like, wow, I don't know why I did that. And she's like, well, the first time you might be scared. But, what, what, how, how do you get unscared?

[00:35:18] You do it, right? You can't do it.

[00:35:22] Rosie: You have to do it.

[00:35:23] Heather: Yeah. You have to decide that you can do it and do it, but you didn't think that you could actually get on here and have a podcast and do this. You would never have started your podcast

[00:35:37] Rosie: because you

[00:35:37] Heather: wouldn't have believed you were good enough to do it.

[00:35:40] So you have to, sorry, my dog's barking. I hope you can't hear that. We have deer. Oh, that's true.

[00:35:47] So when you believe that it's all going to be working out and it's all going to be there for you, then it will be.

[00:35:58] Rosie: Right?

[00:36:00] Heather: Oh, your beliefs make a big difference in, like, between imposter syndrome, fear, fear is so big. People get so worried. Oh, what will my mom think if I do that? What will my, what will the neighbors think?

[00:36:14] Like, who cares what the neighbors think? You have no idea what they're doing when you're not looking, like it doesn't matter. And people get so stuck, I'm like, never, ever, ever take advice from someone who hasn't done what you're trying to do. Right.

[00:36:30] Rosie: Because if

[00:36:30] Heather: they haven't done it, all they're doing is projecting their fear on you.

[00:36:35] Don't listen to those people.

[00:36:37] Rosie: Yeah. Yeah, living in fear really, it really does hold us back, but so many of us fall victim to it, because I guess it's what we're used to, right? We're taught to avoid fear, avoid pain,

[00:36:51] Heather: but how brain is made for that. We're, we're, we're made to actually protect ourselves. Our brain, Survive, we have to survive.

[00:37:00] We have to stay safe and survive because our brain is not really knowing that we're not still out in caveman land, right? Fear is fear, so it, it's not going to feel any different. You're going to, if you're scared, it's a, it's a visceral reaction. You're going to be scared. Right. And you're going to get that anxiety, get the heavy breaths, maybe sweat, it's a real emotion.

[00:37:26] Yeah. Um, But when you stop and break it down, like, what am I really scared of? What's going to happen if I do this? What's really going to happen? Am I going to just go back and start where I was? Um, cause I'm still going to wake up tomorrow and who, who decides if you look dumb?

[00:37:45] You, you're the only one that can decide you look dumb.

[00:37:47] Rosie: Yeah.

[00:37:49] Heather: Yeah. It all comes down to believing you can. And if you believe you can, you really can.

[00:37:58] Rosie: This makes me think a little bit about goal setting, which is something I've kind of been diving into lately. And I, I have a love hate relationship with goals.

[00:38:08] And I think it's kind of similar to setting an intention and you believe it's possible and you can get there. But what do you think if I'm sort of embracing the law of attraction and I've set an intention, then? What if I make progress, but I don't quite get to where, where I wanted to, or that, that big dream, if that makes sense?

[00:38:34] Is there a deadline? Hmm. Okay. Talk more about that. Does it matter? Well, I wouldn't have a deadline. Okay, this is so interesting because everybody says you set a goal, you set an intention, it needs to be time bound. Okay. No. So I have timing on

[00:38:52] Heather: my goals. So I have like a little goal sheet, like I have my thing.

[00:38:57] So um, like right now my goal card says, I am so grateful that I make 60, 000 a month easily and effortlessly. Every month consistently through coaching and in exchange for this money, I help people find their ambition, find their identity, I coached them to help them move forward. Right. So there's always gotta be an exchange

[00:39:24] Rosie: because

[00:39:24] Heather: it's an energy exchange.

[00:39:26] Right. So if your goal is to go to Costa Rica for three months, why does there have to be an end date? My goal doesn't expire, right? There's no expiration. Like if I don't make 60, 000 a month consistently and effortlessly by January, I'm going to change the date to February. And then I'm going to change it tomorrow, like until I get to that goal.

[00:39:53] And then I'm going to raise that number. Right? So there's no expiration date. I mean, obviously you want to be specific and you want to say, I want it by this time, but if it doesn't happen by that time, just change the date. I love that.

[00:40:06] Rosie: Because we seem to think we set this date and we want to get there and then we don't get there and, uh, I'm a failure and you, you give up on it entirely.

[00:40:14] Heather: And people will change their goals based on actually feeling like they didn't make it when it's not that you didn't make it, you just gave up on it because it didn't happen in the timeline that you chose. Right. But the universe doesn't have time. Mm. So it, what if you were supposed to go to Italy and that's right when that volcano blew up, and you didn't get to go because you didn't reach your goal yet.

[00:40:41] But guess what? You wouldn't have wanted to be there. Yeah. True that. So like goals to me, I have a lot of goals, but there's, I just don't put a lot of timelines on them because they don't expire and some I might outgrow and not want to do anymore. Right. Like, yes.

[00:41:01] Rosie: I'm

[00:41:01] Heather: loving

[00:41:02] Rosie: this conversation. There's no expiry expiration date.

[00:41:06] And some you might not want to do anymore. You can change your mind.

[00:41:10] Heather: You can. And I think people put so much time and effort into trying to fit in a box. And there's no box. Like, why be in a box? Right? Like, who does that serve? Yeah. Right. Like, just go do what you want to do. And if, if it works, it works. And if you get an opportunity and you're like, Oh my God, this is so cool.

[00:41:31] so great, but it's the worst timing ever. Well, who decided it was the worst timing ever? What, what exactly is it going to hurt if you do it? Are you going to have to change some plans and move some things around? Maybe, but is that going to be the end of the world? Probably not. Life is, life should be more fluid.

[00:41:48] It really just, it's so rigid. No, I have to do this by this time and this by this time. And it's like, Why? Why? Yeah. Why? Who says? Right?

[00:41:58] Rosie: Who made that rule? Right! There's all these unspoken rules that a lot of us live by and it is so, so limiting.

[00:42:06] Heather: Yeah. And I just, I, I said, I lived the first 50 years for everyone else.

[00:42:11] I'm living this 50 for me. Like I just do it. I, I don't have the restrictions and rules on me that other people decided to put on.

[00:42:22] Rosie: Right. Like,

[00:42:24] Heather: If I don't get my goal by, January, then just writing a new date on there.

[00:42:29] Rosie: Yeah. Stomach ulcer. Mm. I love that. And age. You haven't made age an issue.

[00:42:35] I was, I'm younger than you, I'm 33, but I'll meet people sometimes my age actually and that's ridiculous. And they say, Oh, I'm too old. Like I'm too old to do that. And they just write it off. And so that's, that kind of sacrificed their life and have accepted a life of misery,

[00:42:53] Heather: which is

[00:42:54] Rosie: insanity,

[00:42:55] Heather: pure insanity.

[00:42:56] It is. Why would you ever, like, there is no such thing as too old. I mean, look at all of the, uh, I'm not gonna be able to think of her name now yet. Uh, but there's this, uh, fashion model lady on Instagram. She's everywhere on my feed. She didn't even get started until she was 65. Love that. Yes. And then, look at all these other famous people that didn't start anything until they were at minimum 40.

[00:43:25] Mm hmm. There's no rule to when you can start doing things and who says you can't have an, something else. Like I've probably already lived four lives, I, there's no rule that says you can't do something else, right. Would I have taken some of the leaps I've taken? Like I moved 3000 miles from everything I knew to a town I'd never heard of.

[00:43:49] And, I lived there for three months. Would I have done that if I had, was totin two kids? Probably not, but can I do it now? Absolutely. Right. So, if your circumstance and you're able to do that, then do it. Why not? What's the worst that's going to happen? You got to go back where you came from.

[00:44:08] Rosie: Most decisions and actions we can reverse or get back to.

[00:44:12] You

[00:44:12] Heather: know, it's a different place. And people get these stigmas in there. Like, uh, like I just, I told you, I'm going to sell this house. Well, I'm not going to have anywhere to live. So what am I going to do? I'm probably going to go stay at my mom's for a minute and do stuff. I'm 54 years old. Is that like bad?

[00:44:29] Because I'm going to go move in with my mom, but I'm not technically moving in. I'm going to store a bunch of stuff at her house and go travel. But it's like people put all these stigmas on. How you can live and where you should live and how, like, why, who put that rule? Like, what's wrong with community living?

[00:44:49] Is it like, who made that a bad thing where family supports each other?

[00:44:55] Rosie: Like,

[00:44:56] Heather: People just put all these rules and ideas on you. And I'm just like, what, that doesn't serve me. I'm not going to believe it. Stuff that. Yeah, exactly.

[00:45:05] Rosie: We need to think for ourselves more and asking why is a great way to do that.

[00:45:10] You pause and go, huh. But why? Yeah,

[00:45:13] Heather: like why? And I said so much. People will say something and I'm just like, why not? Let's go. Let's do it. I'm not the person you want to talk about travel because I'll be like, okay, we're leaving tomorrow. Yeah. Like, like, was it last week or the week before? I decided Monday at noon.

[00:45:31] Like, I really don't want to be alone for the holiday and I was on a plane like 10 hours later, so

[00:45:39] Rosie: yeah. Unreal. Unreal. Now, Heather, I've got a question for you. This is something I ask all my guests and I haven't had anyone on Talking about the law of attraction like this. So I can't wait to hear your perspective.

[00:45:55] So my question is, what does freedom mean to you?

[00:45:59] Heather: Being able to do whatever I want. I don't have to worry about rules and like, there's no, I'm just free. Like there's no, I'm not in, I don't even know how to answer that. Like everybody should be. Like I don't have, I mean, and they're like, I'm obviously not free to go down to the dealership and buy a Lamborghini tomorrow because they might want some money that I don't have, but there's, you're just, you're free to make whatever decision you want.

[00:46:33] I don't have to pause and be like, Well, I can't decide to do that because this person might not like it. And that person might not like it. And that would be like, to me, freedom is just being able to live your true life. Like I don't have to hide who I am. I don't have to pretend that I'm somebody I'm not, or obtain your beliefs because you want to force those onto me.

[00:46:57] Like that's not, I'm free. Everybody has free will. And if I think freedom, honestly, is in your mind. That's what it is. Freedom is in your mind and your heart because those are the only, that's all that matters. Your emotions, your mind, your heart. That's where everything comes from. I love that.

[00:47:19] Rosie: That's beautiful.

[00:47:19] And I can, I can feel it as you talk about it. Yeah. It's just where everything is. Mm. Oh, this has been. Such a fun conversation, can I say, and thank you so much for just letting me throw these questions at you and you've taken them without judgment and really helped me understand the law of attraction more.

[00:47:43] Heather: Yeah. I love talking and I live it every single day. This is my life. Like I don't just go on and like, go ahead and make a course. And this is what it is. It's like, I literally live this every day and I would do it whether I got paid or not. Like it's something that I'm just So passionate about, and I mean,

[00:48:01] Rosie: my life, it changed my

[00:48:02] Heather: life.

[00:48:03] Rosie: Yeah. Yeah. And then more people who can embrace that, like, this is something I'm going, okay, how can I go away from this conversation and start taking action on what I've just learned?

[00:48:13] Heather: Yeah. So let me tell you like one of the easiest ways to take action. So when a lot of people are like, Oh, I want money. I want to make a million dollars a year.

[00:48:22] Right. Yes. Yes. Okay. Well, you're never going to convince your subconscious that you're going to go from beginning to a million dollars a year. Mmm. Like this, you're never going to convince yourself conscious of that. I mean, you, you might, I shouldn't say never, but think about climbing Mount Everest, right?

[00:48:42] You got base camps all the way up. So like when I started, I was making 2, And I was like, okay, well, my next base camp to climb that mountain is going to be 10, 000 a month. And then my next base camp is going to be 15, 000 a month. And you just keep going up. And the more that you go up, the more your mind is going to be able to believe you're going to be able to get to that next level.

[00:49:10] So like, if you're making 10, 000 a month, you're going to believe That you're going to be able to get to 15, 000 a month. If you're making 2, 000 a month and you're stressing about money all the time, and you're worried about how you're buying groceries, you're not going to be sitting here, a million dollars a year is 83, 000 a month.

[00:49:30] Rosie: Yeah. Shit. Yeah.

[00:49:31] Heather: So, yeah. So like, you're not going to be like, Oh, I'm making 83, 000 next month. It's like, these aren't going to happen because you have to stay in a realm of where you actually subconsciously believe it's going to happen.

[00:49:49] Rosie: I'm so glad you've said that. That makes so much sense. And immediately I go, huh, that's achievable.

[00:49:56] Heather: Exactly. Exactly. So like running a marathon, right? When you start training for running a marathon, you don't just go out and run 26 miles the first day. You run five miles or three miles or whatever, that, where you are physically, so if you're normally, if you're literally coming from the couch, you're not even going to run a mile.

[00:50:16] You're going to probably walk. So. You got to start and build up. You don't just start at the top. I

[00:50:25] Rosie: hope everybody took that in. It's hard. Rewind and re listen to that, please. So important. And another standout thing from this conversation that I want people to go away with. Especially at this time of year, we're setting new year's resolutions and whatever.

[00:50:45] Is, there's no expiration date on our goals. There's no expiration date. No expiration date.

[00:50:53] Heather: Right. And another thing that's really good at the holiday time is emotional regulation. You don't have to react. When they say, because you're going to go to your family and go do things, whatever, and you might not all see eye to eye on some things or somebody might just like to poke.

[00:51:13] You

[00:51:14] Rosie: know,

[00:51:14] Heather: just don't react, you don't have to react, four plus four is 10. Good for you. See you later. Have fun with your wrath, you just don't have to react. And because when you react, that sets off an emotion in

[00:51:32] Rosie: you, like

[00:51:34] Heather: they poked and you took the bait and you grabbed that. And where does that get you?

[00:51:38] It's your gut is where, what's going to, You're going to feel it in your gut because you just reacted and it's what happens from your gut. It's going to go straight up. So just don't react. It's a hard one. Yeah. It is really hard. Yeah. It took me a long, long time to learn how to do it. I'm still working on it.

[00:52:00] Rosie: Oh yeah. Tell me when you've mastered that and teach me how to do it.

[00:52:04] Heather: Yeah. It's uh, what, but I react less now. So, yeah. Yeah. When people will say something and I'm just like, whatever, yeah. And I might think about it a little bit, but I don't like go home and dwell on what she said for five days.

[00:52:20] Right. Which I would've done before. Mm-hmm . And been thinking about it until the next time I see her kind of thing. It's like, I don't, you don't unpack and live there. Just don't unpack and live there. That's a good one. Don't let them live in your head.

[00:52:38] Rosie: Mm. Yes. Oh, one thing we didn't get to touch on, but I just want to put out there for the listeners is that Heather teaches other people how to create an online course and brings in all this law of attraction stuff.

[00:52:52] And I know most of my listen, listeners are either early stage entrepreneurs or aspiring entrepreneurs and online courses. Are appealing to a lot of people, but not a lot of people are good at it. So please reach out to Heather. If that is an area you are interested in, because there are so many roadblocks in business, but it all ties in with your life.

[00:53:16] Doesn't it?

[00:53:17] Heather: It really does. And people

[00:53:19] Rosie: get so stuck on

[00:53:20] Heather: how it's done. Like, I don't know if you're on a timeline here, but, um, they, when you're working on the actual, in the business on like making a website and building the course and doing all this stuff, you're kind of in a masculine energy and when you're in the, the woo woo and the, manifesting in law of attraction, like really.

[00:53:44] Working on your energy, you're in a feminine energy, right? And you have to balance those. And when you first start learning to be a coach and to build courses and do any of this stuff, if you wanted to make a membership or stuff like you're going to get, as soon as you Google one thing, you're going to get bombarded with every coach on the planet trying to sell you their thing, right?

[00:54:10] It drives me crazy. And I'm just like, no, and I look at their program. I'm like, you have to know, like, there's really the only thing you have to know what platform to choose. And, I go over this with everybody, like what platform and this platform does this, this, and this, this one is better for this, this and this, there's steps to it, but it doesn't have to be perfect.

[00:54:38] Just do it. And you're going to change it anyway. Once you're doing it for a few months, you're going to change it anyway. You're going to progress and get better and you're, it's never going to stay how you started ever. So just start.

[00:54:51] Rosie: Just start. Yes. That's what holds us back. I feel like that is like a whole other episode diving into that.

[00:55:00] I just got so like focused on this law of attraction thing. I think I needed to go to that depth and I, I. I really hope listeners got as much from this as I did, because I think there's a lot of misinformation out there about this area. And as you said, there's a lot of gurus out there who, I don't know, giving off kind of icky vibes and perhaps not, yeah.

[00:55:26] Heather: It's really hard to know how to teach someone how to get out of survival mode if you've never been in survival mode. Ooh,

[00:55:32] Rosie: yes.

[00:55:33] Heather: And this is something I get from a lot of coaches. Like the very first coach I paid, I paid 10, 000 for this coach to coach me on how to do all this stuff and think, like, Dude, you've never missed a meal in your life.

[00:55:46] What are you talking about? Right? I'm

[00:55:50] just like, and it drives me crazy how people try to say, Oh, I'm going to teach you this. And I know what it feels like to be there. You can't know what that feels like, unless you've been there. You literally, right. So that's one reason that I do things the way I do, because I have been there.

[00:56:09] Like I know in my soul, what it feels like to look at a kid and be like, I'm so sorry, I cannot buy that for you because I just don't have enough money.

[00:56:18] Rosie: You

[00:56:18] Heather: know, or, no, you can't have that cereal. This is what we're buying.

[00:56:23] Rosie: Right.

[00:56:24] Heather: These are tough things to have to decide and do, or, Are we going to buy that?

[00:56:29] Are we going to pay the light bill? Things like that. Like if you have, if you're there and you are like, I would love to start a course and I would love to start this and start that or whatever, but I have 0, you can still do it. You can still do it. There's like, there are people that I've coached that have started literally by opening a Facebook group and the course they sell is typed out and they print it on a PDF and put it on like, do not limit yourself because you don't have money because you can do it.

[00:57:05] If you can get it out of your brain, you can do it.

[00:57:09] Rosie: That's right. We have so many, there's just so many limiting beliefs and I'm supporting a client at the moment who's wanting to do an online course, and she's getting so caught up in making it fancy and high production value, that I don't know when it's going to come out. Who knows if it ever will, because It's just, yeah,

[00:57:30] Heather: it's going to get changed.

[00:57:32] Like, like literally do not waste all that time on making it perfect. You will change it, guaranteed. You'll change it. I would bet good money on that.

[00:57:43] Rosie: I had one client so stubborn. I said, just film it on your webcam and whatever. This is like a prototype. Get it out there. Iterate, get the feedback. But no, she decided to spend 10, 000 on getting it professionally filmed.

[00:57:56] And in my head, and I told her this, of course, you're going to be changing this. What are you doing?

[00:58:04] Heather: Yeah, just record it on Zoom or record, like, go on, go on Canva, it's 10, right?

[00:58:11] Rosie: Right.

[00:58:12] Heather: Canva's like the all around tool. It is,

[00:58:16] Rosie: yeah. Stop overcomplicating shit.

[00:58:19] Heather: Yeah, well, what that is? It's procrastination.

[00:58:22] I can't put it out because it's not perfect. Like, yeah, quit procrastinating. But people believe,

[00:58:30] Rosie: people don't believe they're procrastinating, do they?

[00:58:32] Heather: They've got it in their head. No. They literally do not believe they're procrastinating. They think that it's it's gotta be perfect. Oh, well, some people won't buy it if it's not perfect.

[00:58:42] It won't be that, I was the same way. Like I had to have a website before I started. No, I didn't. But

[00:58:47] Rosie: to

[00:58:47] Heather: me, I did. Yeah. So it's, and there's your relief, right? I believed I had to have a website. Yes. So how much time and money did I waste on that website? I don't know. A lot. Ugh. Yeah, so happy to come back and talk about courses if you want.

[00:59:08]

[00:59:12] Right. I'm going to stop the episode there. I don't usually do this. But Heather and I ended up talking for another hour going in-depth about online courses. I was going to release it however, Since getting clearer on the direction of the podcast, I'm really trying to focus more on. A strong personal development theme. Which obviously Heather has a lot of, um, knowledge on, as you can tell from this episode, but if you would like to hear the episode on online courses, it's really helpful. Just reach out to me and I'll share it with you.

[00:59:47] Okay. I'll figure out how to do that. Maybe I can find a clever way through captivate. Anyway, that's all from me. If you're watching on YouTube, you will notice I have a bolt head because I shaved. My hair off yesterday. I feel absolutely. Liberated. I love it. Maybe I'll do an episode about it. Alright, catcher.